During one of my life coaching courses, the instructor taught us a practical “napkin exercise” to use with coaching clients. He encouraged us to draw a diagram on a paper napkin during casual conversations in restaurants as a way to engage our clients in reflection and discussion.
When I heard “napkin exercise,” I chuckled to myself.
While living in France, I had a lot of British friends. We often discussed vocabulary differences between American English and British English. Several of these conversations revolved around the word, “napkin,” and its difference in meanings.
Here’s a story that I came across recently from an American college student who studied in London.
“I’m a napkin person. At every meal I tend to use a lot of napkins . . . anywhere from 3-5, depending on whether the napkins are the flimsy paper kind or the cloth ones. Out at a restaurant, I never seem to have enough napkins. I always ask for more napkins. While in London, I ate out often, and I noticed that every time I would ask the waiter/waitress for more ‘napkins,’ I would get funny looks. I felt as if I had asked for something dirty or disgusting. People knew what I meant and always handed me more napkins. But they seemed to give me a weird look.
Why the strange looks?”
“Who says they speak the same language in Britain? In England, the word ‘napkin’ is typically used to describe a feminine hygiene product (sanitary napkin). Although most people are aware of the double usage of the word, in London, the word ‘serviette’ is preferred in a restaurant or eating establishment. I did not find this out until my third week in London when I was attending an orientation meeting for overseas students through the university, and they went over some of the common problems Americans have while in London. Boy, was my face red! Would have been nice to know a tad earlier.”
Differing Opinions
Perhaps this type of confusing vocabulary incident could only occur in London. I honestly don’t know.
There seem to be differing opinions among my British friends.
In a recent conversation with my British friend from Bristol, I told her this story and asked her opinion. She said that the British would never use the word, “napkin,” to refer to a “sanitary pad.” Rather, they would use the word, “pad.” She went on to say that the British know that Americans refer to “serviettes” as “napkins” and that it’s not a problem.
While traveling in England recently to visit my son—the one I released to the other side of the world, I noticed a sign in the women’s bathroom stall. It didn’t say “sanitary napkins.” Rather, it said, “sanitary towels.”
Now, that adds even more confusion to this topic of conversation.
(Join the poll below in the “Let’s Weave Cultures!” section to share your opinion and experience!)
In any case, just to be safe . . . if I am coaching a British client, I will find another name for the “napkin exercise”!
—The Cultural Story-Weaver
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Poll: What do you think?
1.The British only use the word “napkin” to refer to a “sanitary napkin.”
2. The British use the word “napkin” to refer to a paper or cloth table napkin—like the Americans.
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‘Napkin’ is never used to refer to sanitary pads. It is however used for babies’ diapers, although it is almost universally shortened to ‘nappy’, and I would bet that many younger people do not even know that nappy is short for napkin.
Most people refer to the things used at the table as napkins, but others call them serviettes (as I was brought up to do).
Thank you so much, Susanna, for sharing this. I love that “napkins” are “nappies.” 🙂 I’m also curious if vocabulary varies from region to region in the UK. Thank you again for sharing from your experience.
I know this is old but … no, this is not a regional thing. It is crazy though!
She’s right: Nappy is an abbreviation from the 1920s for napkin.
But it’s more interesting: napkin happens to be a DATED British term for a baby’s nappy. Are you confused yet? There are a lot of things that are confusing in English and its variants and this is why making American English was a mistake! Same with any other English.
And yet to add to the confusion in some ways American English has things more like the original English that British English does not though nothing is coming to my mind presently as an example.
Ready for more confusion? Okay. Here you are: a sanitary napkin actually is a NORTH AMERICAN term for a sanitary towel which is the British English term. So I’m a bit baffled why in London there was confusion there.
Yes I’m a logophile.
Thank you, Cody, for explaining all this . . . to another logophile! Language can be so confusing and so complicated. I think that’s why it’s so fun and interesting! 🙂 Thanks for reading.
I’m English and never use the word serviette for a cloth napkin. Always napkin. Only ever need one. It’s not for mopping a mess it’s for tidying and keeping clean. If you make a mess ask for help. Don’t ask for more napkins.
Sanitary pad. Nobody in a reasonable restaurant would be confused or think that’s what you were asking for, it’s the asking for more, particularly if they are cloth, that is confusing them.
Thank you for this information, Amanda! This is very help and very interesting! 🙂
” In England, the word ‘napkin’ is typically used to describe a feminine hygiene product (sanitary napkin). Although most people are aware of the double usage of the word, in London, the word ‘serviette’ is preferred in a restaurant or eating establishment. ” Absolute nonsense! The word serviette is French, napkin is English. Not only is it a language thing, it is class thing too. If you are upper- or middle-class you use the word napkin. If you are working class you use the word serviette. U or non-U. (https://bit.ly/44laMWu). Decent restaurants never, EVER use the word serviette. Workers’ caffs and McDonalds? Maybe. Oh, and to find an English person using the words “sanitary napkin” is less likely than a finding a four-leaf clover.
Thank you, Bill, for your cultural and linguistic insight! That is so helpful, and I appreciate your opinion and words. Are you from the UK? You have certainly helped me grow in cultural awareness today. Thank you!