MY GIFT TO YOU—GET YOUR FREE EBOOK—“THE 5-DAY JOURNEY TO CULTURAL AWARENESS”!
I was running late to my Spanish lesson. Vincent was already waiting for me outside. I jumped out of the shower, threw my wet hair up in a pony tail, and rushed out the door.
As we walked towards the tapas bar to meet our language tutor, I suddenly stopped in my tracks.
“Ugh!” I thought to myself. “What if it’s not culturally appropriate in Spain for a woman to go out of her house with wet hair?”
A Strange Question
Now, this may seem like a strange question to ask myself. However, I was a cultural learner, and I needed to know. In all of my reading of Dos and Taboos Around the World and Cultural Shock! Spain, I had not come across this topic.
Why’s that? Probably because no one really thought about it.
But, I did, and here’s why.
When I was pursuing my Masters degree in Cross-Cultural Studies, I had a female professor who had lived and worked in Mali, West Africa for decades. She had told us a story about her family’s first days in the village, living along the river.
Mary had beautiful, long, flowing hair that hung down to her knees. She washed her hair often, not every day, but often.
She didn’t like to blow dry her hair, and electricity was hit-or-miss and a real luxury in that part of the world. Most days, Mary would shower and then walk around the village, allowing her hair to naturally dry in the hot sun and breeze.
Why All the Stares?
She noticed that everyone kept staring at her, her wet hair, and her husband. This went on for days, weeks, and months. Finally, Mary could speak enough of the local dialect that she could ask a simple question to the women.
“Why do you look at me and my husband every time I come out of the house with wet hair? I don’t understand.”
Mary was a cultural learner. She was living in a foreign land, learning a new language, and living among people different from her. Mary and her husband took risks and asked questions, so that they could learn . . . so that their eyes could be open to the world around them. They didn’t want to live in that place, among those people, in ignorance. Mary and her husband wanted to know, to learn, to understand, to adapt, to integrate . . .
Mary wanted to cultivate her cultural awareness, and she did it by asking questions to the locals in her community.
That day, she asked the question. She just had to know.
She Had to Know—Cultural Awareness!
“Why do you look at me and my husband every time I come out of the house with wet hair? I don’t understand,” she asked the women as they walked together to the village market.
The women were uncomfortably silent. Finally, one of the local women dared to open her mouth and respond to Mary’s cultural question.
“Women only wash their hair after having intimate relations with their husband. You and your husband must have intimate relations a lot,” said the young woman with her eyes down, a bit embarrassed to speak the words.
Mary was horrified and tried to explain to the women that she washed her hair frequently because of the African dirt. It had nothing to do with her husband!
The women all laughed together!
Horror and Laughter
From that time on, Mary started washing her hair less frequently, and she never walked out of the house until it was completely dry!
I will never forget that story!
As I walked to my Spanish lesson, I wondered what my tutor would think about my wet hair. What would the waiter say? Would they look at me and my husband with curiosity?
Is it Culturally Appropriate?
When our language helper arrived, I asked her the question.
“Is it culturally appropriate for me to walk out of my house with my hair wet?” I asked her.
She seemed puzzled that I would ask such a strange question.
“No, it’s not a problem, why?” she asked.
“In some cultures, it is a problem,” I told her. I went on to tell her the story about Mary and the Bozo people.
We all laughed!
Thankfully, it’s culturally acceptable here in Spain for a woman or man to walk out of the house with their hair still wet.
Good thing! Chances are, I’ll be running late to next week’s Spanish lesson too—with wet hair!
MY GIFT TO YOU—GET YOUR FREE EBOOK—“THE 5-DAY JOURNEY TO CULTURAL AWARENESS”!
—THE CULTURAL STORY-WEAVER
LET’S WEAVE CULTURES!
Have you ever traveled or lived in a foreign country in which you did something culturally inappropriate—but didn’t know? If so, how did you eventually find out?!
We invite you to tell us your own cultural stories and global adventures . . . as you engage with the world, breaking down barriers, building bridges, and “weaving cultures”! Write about them in the comment box below.
