As I pulled the beautiful teal-green rug out of the plastic bag, I felt shame and embarrassment. My new Moroccan neighbor had felt culturally and socially obligated to give me her treasured object. I had complimented her over and over about its beauty and color. I even went as far as to tell her that I would love to have the same one for my new house.
Well, here it was in my hands. I had the EXACT same one for my new house. My neighbor’s prized rug from Mecca was now mine.
I made a huge cultural blooper that day and learned a hard cultural lesson that I would never forget!
“The Perfect Spot”
The rug was absolutely stunning—I had to admit. The only thing I needed now was the “perfect spot” for it in my house.
It wasn’t a large rug, so I thought it would look nice in a hallway or small entrance area. I really wanted to show it off—display it in a location where every guest could see it. I didn’t want anyone to miss it!
As I looked around my barren and undecorated house, I thought about the guest bathroom. It would look perfect in there—bringing a splash of vivid color to a “drab” place. The bright, teal-green color would “pop” against the white marble floors and green and white tiles.
I proudly laid it on the center of my bathroom floor in front of the double sink. Every guest would see it and parade upon it.
No One Would Miss It!
A few days later, one of my Moroccan friends came over for a visit.
At one point, she excused herself to go to the bathroom. I knew that my friend would notice my new “bathroom” rug. Surely she would like it as much as I did.
Upon exiting, she asked me why I had a “prayer rug” in my bathroom.
“What?!” A prayer rug!?” I was so embarrassed. I didn’t know that this beautiful, teal-green rug from Mecca was a “prayer rug.”
A Cultural Lesson: “Hashek!”
A bathroom, with a toilet, is not considered a “clean” place in Arab culture. It is “Hashek,” as we say in Morocco—certainly not a place where you would roll out your prayer mat and talk to God. It was the last place you would have a sacred prayer rug!
I was so ashamed! “Hashek!”
I explained to my friend what had happened at my neighbor’s house a few days before. We both laughed hysterically!
That day, I learned a few more valuable cultural lessons—how to identify “prayer rugs” and where NOT to place them.
Thankfully, my dear friend had the courage to tell me about my cultural mistake.
What if my next-door neighbor had come over for mint tea—only to find her blessed “gift” on my dirty bathroom floor?!
—The Cultural Story-Weaver
Let’s Weave Cultures!
Have you ever made a cultural mistake that led to much shame and embarrassment? How did you handle it when you realized what you had done or said? Were the local hosts understanding of your cultural mistake and blooper or were they offended?
What other “Dos and Taboos Around the World” have you learned?
We invite you to tell us your own cultural stories and global adventures . . . as you engage with the world, breaking down barriers, building bridges, and “weaving cultures!” Write about them in the comment box below.
Oh, good heavens. That was certainly a blooper!! Insult to injury. I will know to keep my mouth shut if I like something a Moroccan student has. Is this Islamic culture or Moroccan? Should I be quiet if I like something that my Yemini students are wearing?
Very much enjoyed the story.
That was our experience in Morocco. I have heard of many other cultures with similar “rules.” I have been reading the book, “Do’s and Taboos Around the World.” It’s fascinating and highly recommended. It doesn’t have anything specific about Yemen—just looked. 🙂 The best thing to do is to ask your students. It could make a great cultural topic for your next ESL class!
Hi Kelli! I just did some more research. In the book, “Do’s and Taboos Around the World,” I found a section on the “Gulf States.” Although “Yemen is the only state on the Arabian Peninsula that is not a member of the GCC (Gulf Cooperation Council),” it is close both geographically and culturally. In referring to Arab hosts in the Gulf States, it is advised to “Be careful not to admire one of his possessions too warmly; he may insist on giving it to you, and you may be forced to accept rather than offend.” The comment is accompanied by a hilarious drawing of a Westerner being handed the reigns of the camel of his Arab friend!
That is EXACTLY what happened with my Moroccan neighbor! I had to accept her rug in order not to offend her. What if I had complimented her on her entire house?! Please ask your students from Yemen if this cultural “rule” applies to them and their country, and then let us all know!
Thank goodness for dear friends who can laugh WITH us at our bloopers and not AT us. Although nothing quite seems to break down barriers like laughter!
You are so right! I have also learned to laugh AT myself! It’s certainly better than crying as we make tons of language and cultural bloopers. While living abroad, people would often chuckle when they heard my accent and funny words and expressions. I would simply respond, “I’m so thankful that I have brought joy and laughter into your life today! “Spreading joy around the world is an unexpected advantage of foreign language learning. 🙂